Identity Ingrain — the Secret to Long-Term Consistency and Success
March 2nd edition of the Manximize newsletter
NEWSLETTER
Identity Ingrain — the Secret to Long-Term Consistency and Success
I was teetering on the brink of burnout.
Star-high screen time. Poor focus. Left-over To-Do items. Constant self-doubt. Excessive FOMO. Miserable jealousy. Irritable anxiety.
Momentary bursts of clarity—only for the mental fog to return in full force.
But yesterday, a deep introspective discussion with my friend Akshad Singi vaporized the noxious fog.
While there were many insights, there’s one quick nugget I want to share with you.
It’s been the #1 differentiating factor between my successes and failures.
The Magic of A Strong Ego Investment
After 2+ years of struggling with NoFap relapses, I’m now over 80+ days clean.
The change?
A mindset shift from, “I must not jack off to p*rn as I’m doing NoFap,” to “I neither watch porn nor fap.”
A shift from a weak to a powerful ego investment.
With a weak ego investment, a relapse is only a relapse. A cheat day is only a cheat day. A skipped workout is only a skipped workout.
So you console yourself with, “No problemo! I can restart tomorrow.”
But with a powerful ego investment?
A relapse is a lethal blow to your self-esteem and integrity.
The ego isn’t your enemy — it’s the best tool at your disposal to control your own mind.
This Simple Word Is the #1 Enemy of Success
No matter what you’re trying to achieve, get rid of the word “trying.”
Scratch that — no matter what you are achieving, get rid of the word “trying.”
Instead, pull identity and ego into the picture — to throw self-accountability on steroids:
- You aren’t trying to maintain your weight — you are a fit person.
- You aren’t attempting NoFap — you don’t jack off to p*rn.
- You aren’t aspiring to be a writer — you are a writer.
- You aren’t striving to quit cigarettes — you don’t smoke.
- You aren’t trying to wake up early — you are an early riser.
Initially, your identity will resist change—and your old ego will shame you with an imposter feeling.
This is when you need to persevere — re-affirm your new belief, visualize it, breathe deeply, and don’t give in.
But as pride replaces shame, your ego will fight against inconsistency.
Even the thought of relapsing or skipping will make you feel deep discomfort.
Gone will be the need to torture your willpower.
My Best Article of The Week
My most masterfully crafted personal essay in recent times:
The 3 Best YouTube Videos I’ve Come Across Lately
This time, you’re in for a REAL treat:
- “GUYS: find your UGLY DUCKLING” by PsychHacks: Hands-down, the best dating lesson for modern-day men.
- “Firing MACHINE GUNS vs. doing Yoga?” by Kaal Raam: This legend explains the duality of man, meditation, and nutrition science — all while cooking delicious chicken broth.
- “Watch This If You’re In Your 20s” by Alex Hormozi: It’s Alex Hormozi. Enough said.
Bonus:
- “Baby Hippo Raised By Rhinos Meets A Hippo…” by The Dodo: A wholesome treat that will get you smiling ear-to-ear.
Any YT videos you’ve enjoyed of late? I’d love to know.
This is a post from my weekly Manximize newsletter with 2500+ subscribers. Join here for no B.S. advice on life, productivity & masculinity.